April 21st, 2026: 11:12 AM
I’m getting back into the habit of consistent writing again. Although writing is my passion and am able to express myself the best through it, I don’t do it every day. But, you know what? That is completely okay! I feel like social media tends to push the idea that you need to do your hobbies, your passions, every single day. This might work for some people but for others, at least for me, life takes a toll at times and forces me to recharge.
I have been learning more and more about what my nervous system needs as I go through each day. I grew up adapting to only coping with my depression and anxiety, learning the mentality to power through each day until I physically couldn’t anymore. Is that healthy? Not at all! However, this is a mentality which is all too familiar to many who go through life with trying to take care of their mental health.
So what happens when you get a diagnosis where you have to throw all that knowledge of what you thought you knew out the window?
Well, I’ve only commenced the journey of this for a few months when I received my diagnosis, myself. After receiving the results of my Autism, ADHD, and OCD, many questions started to answer themselves for me.
And all of my symptoms began to free themselves, refusing to let me have a say anymore.
It has been extremely overwhelming to say the least.
There have been so many days where I find myself feeling so exhausted and frustrated with my brain.
Days where I feel like I’m going through the motions, robotic. Yet there have also been days where I feel for the first time in so many years, perhaps since I was a child, where I felt the most me. The me who had unintentionally been stored away at the hands of an ablest society, a judgmental crowd. I had become so consumed by the masking, the need for survival in a misunderstanding world in which fear led me to feeling nothing but lost.
But I don’t think I was ever really lost…
In fact, the me who had always been in there was just waiting to be found again.
And I’ve finally found them.
See you at the next one, good humans!! – CL
